T was a bit nervous about my meeting his parents as he had never brought a girlfriend home before. Any girls who had been at his place were simply friends.
It was during the day that I first went to T's place. Only his father was at home as his mother was out at a concert with friends. T told me that I would know pretty soon if his father liked me or not because he would go off to his study to work if it was thumbs down.
Fred was very charming and in his old fashioned way kissed my hand when we met. He used to do this to all women and it was interesting to watch how reasonably stern women would end up giggling and blushing like schoolgirls. I don't think I giggled but I probably blushed - it was the bane of my life.
T had told him that I spoke German so he tested that out. I spoke good German in those days and got his jokes, even those with double meanings, so he was pleased. We chatted for ages, had a cup of tea and finally T had to drag me away because we were meeting up with some friends. Fred liked me and I liked him. In fact I grew to really love him and am pleased to say the feeling was mutual.
T's mother was pretty unnerving when we met for the first time. She got my upper arms in a vice-like grip and stared at me and said, 'you are a very pretty girl' and didn't let go for ages. I broke out in a sweat, squirmed and blushed furiously. After that she was very pleasant and seemed pleased that I spoke German, had reasonable manners and wasn't a complete cretin.
T's sister Cathy was 16 and also still lived at home so I met her and we got on very well.
Within a few weeks I was invited to Sunday night dinner. We had grilled T-bone steak, rice, some sort of vegetable and bread and butter cucumbers. I had never eaten as much meat as is in a T-bone and it didn't agree with me but I loved the bread and butter cucumbers. Afterwards there was cake for dessert. T's mother baked very well.
T's parents, unlike mine, didn't get on. T and his sister were used to the snide comments and tense undertones around the dinner table but I never felt completely comfortable so when the doctor put me on Valium for the stress I was experiencing at home, it helped there too.
T's parents often had family members over for afternoon tea on weekends so I was introduced to T's married older sister, his brother-in-law and their new baby boy all of whom were lovely. I also met his rather dotty uncle and aunt who had never had children.
We eventually got our parents together at my place. My mother was T's mother's equal at cake baking and the first meeting went well. The table was set with a hand embroidered tablecloth, afternoon tea sized linen napkins, fine bone china and silver cake service. Things T's family was familiar with. Strong coffee, whipped cream etc along with delicious cakes and lively discussions made an extremely pleasant afternoon much to T and my relief. These get togethers became more frequent at each other's houses. T and I often wouldn't stay but might come back hours later and afternoon tea would have spilled over into the evening with open sandwiches and cognac. It was marvellous that the parents got on. T's mother particularly liked my father, recognised that my mother was a good cook but didn't like her very much. Luckily Mutti didn't ever realise. Everyone (except T's mother) really liked Fred, T's father.
During the time my mother was being dreadful T's mother was very supportive. I even brought her a big bouquet of flowers because I was so grateful that she was being nice. Things, however, did not stay the same.
When she got back from Germany Mutti's attitude to T changed completely. As she got used to him she liked him more and more. T's mother on the other hand finally realised that I was going to be around on a permanent basis and liked me less and less. Her son, the apple of her eye, was, she thought, being dragged away from her. She put such stress on T that he would have dreadful migraines.
T's parents' relationship became ever more tense and after T and I had been going out for about a year, his mother decided to move and work in Vienna where her mother and two sisters still lived. Everyone heaved a sigh of relief.
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